Zoo

After spending all day at the zoo with 3 Hancock kids and 2 Hancock parents, I WAS BEAT. I went home and slept til' midnight. I loved seeing the girls laugh when I appeared at the top of the stairs -- they toured me through the kitchen telling me my dinner options; we puzzled for a bit.

My favorite zoo animals, you ask? The red panda, the otter, and the kangaroo. Naturally.

My heart aches for time with the Lord. Just God and Bethany.

Current reads: The Gutter, The Last Drop Out, Passion and Purity, Southern Jack Tales, My Utmost for His Highest

cons/pros

I will not dwell on the cons, but I will begin with them. 

• Food's not appealing. Sleep doesn't come.
• A great co-worker was let go at work today because of budget cuts and I have never seen a more helpless, distraught looking group of people than our staff at 8:30 AM today. :( Literally the only thing we could say was PRAY. I didn't want that answer to sound small... but it felt small. God will provide and prove us wrong. 

I've been told and I know and I feel that gratitude works miraculous things in wavering hearts. So the pros.

• I love the people I work with -- they are the biggest variety of servants I've ever met.
• I love the people I live with -- they are goofy, gentle, and caring. Rachel and I had our date night (a regular one-on-one for all Harmon-Housers) and made caramel apples. It was successful. And by successful, I mean tasty. There might be caramel permanently grafted into clothes and kitchen items here.
• I love the people I don't get to see enough. I love getting to see their faces. Noelle popped by tonight to borrow a book, the Ashley/Chelsea/Mary Beth trio left me a message on facebook informing me that they were my stalkers after all these years of not being freshmen in my unit.
• I love the people I share a name with -- my mom sent me a package equivalent to what Buzz Aldrin got from his mom when he travelled to the moon. This is, naturally, assuming he liked chocolate a LOT. I spoke briefly to my dad on the phone. He always tells a non-chalent story of some nightmarish adventure and ends by asking if he can pray for ME. What's wrong with him?
• I love the God I live for -- He provides peace and love and encouragement in every facet of life.

I'm reading a new book

"... but little deaths have to be died just as great ones do... 

We are not meant to die merely in order to be dead. 

God could not want that for the creatures to whom He has given the breath of life. 

We die in order to live."

-Elisabeth Elliot, Passion and Purity

Did you know I was almost named Elisabeth?  
Fun fact of the day.


I'm listening to Let There Be by Gungor. 
I'm imagining the beginning of the world and I'm in awe.

A stranger laughed at me tonight

This is what I look like when I rollerblade.

Achilles Heel

I read The Hobbit to Rachel and Kayla tonight. After four or five pages, I paused for an, "Are you guys still awake?" and received SILENCE.

Why does everyone fall asleep when I read to them??!!

First Day

of FALL! September 22nd. I finished 15 summer reads (see the right-hand sidebar). My goal for fall is also 15.

Odds

We flushed Slippy today. Candles were lit around the toilet, a eulogy was said by yours truly, and a moving rendition of Friends was sung by those of us who grew up with Michael W. Smith.

I'm in the midst of repairing the entirety of a car (damage not my fault) and a laptop (damage partially the fault of my supposed "thunder fingers").

I'm exploring the concept of contentedness in singleness: an ideology I once had almost perfected, but I'm a little rusty. I'll have to work on it.

Against decent odds, I'm engulfed by love. Praise the Lord :)

I don't mind odds. My favorite number is odd. My favorite books are often odd. In truth, I have enough odd-ness in my favor to last an eternity. The goal, presently, is to focus on the "in-my-favors."

Not Coincidence

"Our Lord's temptations and ours are in different realms until we are born again and become His brothers... Satan does not tempt us just to make us do wrong things -- he tempts us to make us lose what God has put into us through regeneration, namely, the possibility of being of value to God. He does not come to us on the premise of tempting us to sin, but on the premise of shifting our point of view, and only the Spirit of God can detect this as a temptation of the devil."Oswald Chambers, My Utmost for His Highest, "September 18"

In the desert, Satan told Christ to prove His value, prove His worth, prove His place as a Son. Christ, fully-man, was tempted to doubt his value, worth, and place. Christ, fully-God, knew He functioned out of a deeper power than his humanness. "You shall not put the Lord, YOUR GOD, to the test."

Satan tests my value -- our value -- today. I have Christ in me and He will not be shaken. God spoke value into me when He breathed life into me. What He has spoken cannot be revoked. 

Today is irony.

Can words in their lowest moments become poetry in its deepest moments?

Irony is poetry.

Today is poetry. 

And in my deepest moment,

it is well with my soul.

God is not safe. But He is good. 

Good in a more substantial sense than I will ever see with this pair of eyes.

I'm looking forward to the new set. They're on layaway; 

I'll cross 

my fingers that they're 

blue again.

I just finished

To Kill a Mockingbird and really, really enjoyed it. I was sad to put it back on Zach Aument's bookshelf.

I'm praying pretty fervently for peace amidst life happening.

The people I live with are better than the people you live with --

they're at LEAST on par with your people.

I've got great people.

Anne was cooking and Rachel was cleaning as I walked in the door today. "Do you recognize the stuff on the table?" Rachel asked innocently.

On our table sat a cup of coffee from McConn, To Kill a Mockingbird, and one of my favorite sweaters. She had dug the latter out of my winter clothes box in the basement. She also turned the air on high so that the living room would be cold enough for me to wear a sweater.

TELL ME. Tell me the people you live with stalk your blog and grant your wishes. I bet they don't. I'm delighted.  

I'm aching for a sweater, book, and chocolatey-coffee day

How I feel

Nostalgic. Abstract. Surreal. Unexplainable.

Throw Back

I don't listen to music all the time. Every once and a while it's nice to put on some headphones and dive in to a melody. Harmony when you need some. Rhythm when you don't have one. A beat when you feel off-kilter.

This popped up on shuffle and it felt so sweet to listen to nostalgia. The Hush Sound was my favorite in high school. This was one of my old jams: I'm feeling it now.

Faith. Hope. Love

These are so hard, but so necessary right now.

Summer Ain't Over YET

Summer ends on September 21st -- which means it is still summer and my summer reading is GOIN' STRONG. (see right-hand sidebar)

I just finished my 12th summer read: Zoli by Colum McCann. Being well read is a personal competition for me. I'm hoping for 15 by the first day of fall. Then... on to the autumn reads! Woohoo!

Upcoming page-turners:

• The Gutter by Craig Gross
• The Last Dropout by Bill Milliken
• Passion and Purity by Elizabeth Elliot
• The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini
• Big Fish by Daniel Wallace
• Taran Wanderer by Lloyd Alexander
• The High King by Lloyd Alexander

Yay, people :D

I went to McConn with Kayla, Rachel, Kyla, and Eric and OH. MY. GOSH. Everybody's back and I love it. I got so energized because 1) I had COFFEE from McConn 2) I got to say hi to people!

I saw Carrie and Haley and Mary Beth and Courtney -- they're all juniors! We talked about the fact that I was a junior when they were my freshmen residents. AH! I love it.

I'm thrilled by this hope

They're Back

Everybody at IWU is moving back in. I'm relieved -- it's fun to see the campus full of hustle and bustle again.

I've been feeling kind of sucky the past few days. Like a winter landscape: but not a breathtaking one. I'm really hoping that wears off.