Prayer for the day

Sacrifice and offering you did not desire— 
   but my ears you have opened— 
   burnt offerings and sin offerings you did not require. 
Then I said, “Here I am, I have come— 
   it is written about me in the scroll.
I desire to do your will, my God; 
   your law is within my heart.”

-Psalm 40:6-8

I desire to do Your will, my God. I desire to have Your heart, my God. I desire to know what that looks like tangibly, my God. You are my God, do not delay.

Tonight, I am young.

Number one. I love my daddy so much.
Number two. Glee (apparently) just made my favorite-band-of-sophomore-year famous. Finally.

writesingtelldraw

I’ve told you a hundred tall stories,
I’ve sung you a thousand sweet songs,
I’ve wrote you a million ridiculous rhymes
(Though sometimes the grammar was wrong).
I’ve drawn you a zillion pictures,
So being as fair as can be,
After all that I’ve writtensungtolddrawn for you,
Won’t you writesingtelldraw one for me?

-shel silverstein

"Miss Mueller, some people think I'm 'just' a kid, but I know some good truths. Remember..."

Verbatim advice from seven 6th grade students to a teacher graduating and going into the adult world...

1. Remember, don't hitchhike. There could be creepy people that you don't know and they could take you some place and friends never see you. You could never teach again if they take you. The students would miss you. Have patience with the talkative kids. They know who they are. They are just annoying. The End? -6th grade boy

2. Remember to always try your hardest and try to do one thing at a time so you can balance your focus. You also need to know to never be afraid to ask questions. Even as an adult you don't understand everything. Now sometimes adults think they know everything but they don't. Just try your hardest to remember these things and never be afraid to ask for help! That way you can enjoy your crazy adulthood not be a prisoner to it. -6th grade girl

3. Remember that don't change your personality. You're kind, funny, and creative. My point is you make learning fun and we don't get bored with endless boring sheets of homework. -6th grade boy

4. Remember... that if you want to be a good teacher and get along with kids don't act like a kid. See kids never take teachers that act like kids seriously they think it is ok to do whatever we want she will let us. When I have had subs like that I know that that the room is gonna be hecktic. I personally like teachers better when they take their job seriously. Never let the ids get too out of controll or bad things will happen. That is my advice to you. -6th grade girl

5. Remember that God will always be there to help you. You an always go to him when you need help. He will always be there. No matter what happens, he will help you. He has helped me a lot, and I know he will help you. Just be calm and don't freak out. You can always go to him. -6th grade boy

6. Remember to still have fun! Don't let work get you stressed out - your still young. You can go out with friends and have a good time. Just because you have a job and think you have to be all fancy and act like an adult doesn't mean you have to stop being a kid. Let out the eight year old in you. Another thing is don't let your work get in the way of friends and family! You only have family and friends for so long you have a job forever. -6th grade girl

7. Remember that no matter how hard things get you can always move on and make good and/or bad decisions because your decisions will change your life and sometimes you can't change the things that happen so make a thoughtful choice. One more thing. You should never ever just spend your money because sometimes things you want aren't the things you need! Pay your bills first and then buy the things you need around the house like food and necessary house needs. Then once you are finished with these then you can either save your left overs for a time in life when you really need it like for your wedding or babies. Or you can spend it. As for me, I would put it into a savings account for when I retire, get layed off, when I have kids, or for my wedding that I have always dreamed of. You can or can't take my advice but I do hope it has influenced your choices about your life decisions. Because your life decisions will influence your future. -6th grade girl

good news, bad news

You want the good news or the bad news first? When I ask my 6th graders that, I find out that they're just learning how to answer. Many shout, "Good news!" while the rest hush them and explain why they want the bad news first. It's cute. :]

Bad news. I'm just now starting to write out the teaching scenarios and rationales for my artifacts. You have no idea what that means. A teaching scenario narrates a teaching situation. It looks like this. A rationale describes, explains, and reflects upon a specific thing done while teaching, using standards and requirements. It looks like this. I have to have 8 artifacts, each with a teaching situation and a rationale, for my first placement. That's 24 linked documents. I also have to have my 8 metacognitive domain descriptions and my professional portfolio (resume, educational philosophy paper, autobiography, goals and objectives page) finished. But I'm not so worried about those.


Good news. I just went through my lessons collecting artifacts, and I have all of them with papers to spare! I had a lot of good lessons and connections and methods. Where's the picture of that kid? Hold on...

losing, running, reasoning

dream 1
The neighborhood boys' baseball team needed an extra person, so I frantically ran through our labyrinth house -- where every room looked like an attic -- trying to find my glove. I found old gloves and flimsy gloves and big gloves and small gloves, but mine was nowhere to be seen. I arrived at the coach's house only to find that they weren't going to play.

dream 2
I was running up hundreds of stairs in a building that was entirely grey stair wells. Men in trench coats kept chasing me and trying to grab me. Every time I reached a dead end, I would fight with a man and eventually kick him down the cement stairs.

dream 3
I was in the Koch's 15 passenger van with Zach and Karen. I had two macbooks and Karen had one. She threw a fit because she couldn't find her macbook in the messy van. We had been waiting for relatives to show up so we could caravan back to a house for a birthday party. I finally spotted all three computers under the car seats and Karen calmed down.

Movers and Shakers

Isn't it amazing what simple things like "picnik" can do?

paradise is coming

Nick made me realize that all of my friends will know one another and live and laugh with one another for eternity. Now that's a thought.

Oculus Reparo

Anne is eating hair

Mr. Van Dop and I had students relay competitive post-it notes -- the kids loved it. I secured our names for the Harmon house off campus. Rachel and Kayla picked me up from school and we had a laugh fest. Kayla had an animal knot in her back and insulted Rachel's massaging abilities. Rachel realized her mistake was that she was not just poking Kayla gruffly in her shoulder bone. THAT is the way of a true masseuse. (Rachel mocking Kayla: "OH I'm a princess and you're a professional masseuse so you should know what you're doing.") Kayla almost killed us trying to freak out Joe on the road. Life is good.

valentine

Last night, Mike took me to Paynes. He made fun of everything he thought was "hipster" and talked for hours about funny swim team stories. It was great. Our waitress was HIGH ON LIFE. The cheque was in a basket. Our menus were in books about Greece and Spain. It was just a good time.

Jon and Jess named their fish funny names. Zach had music in his bones. Mike and I sat and read and talked for hours. He explained the history of personhood to me. I love him.

Happy Valentines!

I was never against Valentine's day as a single: I got to make crafts and I got chocolate. Lots of chocolate. Totally fair trade.

I made a pop-up card for Michael and he brought Starbucks and a card when he picked me up this morning. :] 

Kids came up to me throughout the day with suckers and candies and timidly asked if they could eat their treats. Without blinking, I'd happily reply, "Of course you can! Happy Valentine's day!" I printed off our worksheets on pink paper. GUYS. Our lesson tied so perfectly together! We talked about Saint Valentine and tied it to saints' days from Catherine, Called Birdy. We made skits and analyzed how people show what they think by what they say and do. It was so, so great. In both classes, I had a skit that made me laugh out loud -- normally my laughter is in good humor, not because I'm truly tickled.

At one point, one of my students shouted the beginning of his line, but never finished because he thought he saw a period: "THE UMPS!" He bellowed. It didn't make any sense. He was supposed to say "The ump's totally unfair!"

When I was being observed, a boy told his two "girlfriends" that there was plenty of him to "go around." I rang my "end of skit" bell a billion times as we all laughed -- including Dr. Seaborn, who was observing me.

texting like we're in a book

"soo beth"
"Soooo ben"
"I have a bad memory. Lets start with that. I need you to tell me the end of a story."

Hindsight

I would not recommend Chronicle unless you're prepared for a dark commentary on the abuse of power... with very little redemption.

I would recommend the Chuck Wagon as a pizza place. I would recommend Michael Conner as a boyfriend. But I won't. Not for you, leastways. He's happily taken. :]

9

1. Anne is off someplace taking pictures of wild horses. I have no idea what's happening with that.
2. I slept on the couch in our empty lodge. Everyone has people to go and places to see.
3. I dreamt that I went to a wedding in Africa and had to walk across a large ocean bridge with a drunken wedding party. There were a lot of sharks throughout. At some point, I was also wandering around the Koch's house, which was in a snow tundra... but there was a garden on the roof.
4. Yesterday Mike came over and we wrote down favorite quotes from One Thousand Gifts.
5. For someone who has a two day week this upcoming week, I sure have a lot to do. Student teaching is SO UNDERESTIMATED.
6. Yay! Two day week!
7. I spent over an hour looking up movie reviews because I'm in charge of picking between two movies.
8. Mike and I are going to the Chuck Wagon and then to said movie since it's our
9 months today.

dull, doll

Those closest to me are confident in me, but I feel like my little mistakes add up and make me seem like a failure. I feel scrutinized from every angle, and I am exhausted. I am struggling not to be discouraged, despite my accomplishments and growth.

I was telling my roommate these thoughts and she asked if she was supposed to fill out a "roommate evaluation" of me. I told her yes, and they would ask her about my sleeping habits. She immediately responded "She prays in her sleep! She's going to be a damn good teacher!" Referring, naturally, to the other night, when she... well, she heard me praying in my sleep. Katie B, you're a doll.

Michael made me dinner tonight, because I feel :( and because he's great. He also got strawberries because they're my favorite. Michael is a doll as well.

Kyla is sitting and talking with me. We are doing teacher things. She would be a really cute literal doll.

Catherine, Called Birdy

Today, we reviewed the conflicts of the book... then, we discovered the themes of the book... then, we realized the meaning of the title in light of the themes... then, we synthesized the themes of our own lives. My sixth grade classroom was alive with connections! Yes, I kept them a minute after class because the buzz of learning often diffused into muddled chatter, but I was still proud.

Better

Today I felt much more prepared. Besides a couple minute book-scramble-fiasco and the realization that my classroom management must, must, must be spot on, learning was had.

I had a hiccup of doubt when a student begged me to stay for the rest of the semester. He said I was "more fun" than my cooperating teacher, and I said "But you learn more with her!" And he said "Yeah, but--" In my head: "Oh my gosh, they're not learning!" Nah. They're learning. I'm fine. They're fine.

I also have been kicking my cough-thing in the butt with good ol' fashion giant pills. It's working. I feel 90% better. :]

Mmm, mmm, good.

I love Michael and Bethany Berens. They are the coziest couple with the coziest food and the coziest book shelf. Kayla, Mike, and I ate delicious soup and talked Lent with them.

Mmm... :]

8th period prep

The last day of week five was a pretty weighty low. My lesson plan didn't send, my observation time changed, my students talked over me, I felt very sick and tired, I missed lunch, and I cried after my very helpful observing professor met with me. My sub was a 2011 business grad from IWU and I felt embarrassed to have such a hard day in front of this guy who was working for "easy money."

The kids and the sub and my observer and the faculty were all okay. It was just me. At a moment like this, I would ask my students "is this an internal or an external conflict?" to which a sweet little blonde would poke up her hand as a rambunctious boy would blurt "INTERNAL!"

I love teaching, but after today I want to crawl in a hole for a couple hours.

upside

Today, they were quiet in the library. It was all I'd ever wanted.