TGI-Break

Student: So do time zones separate regions?
Me: Not really. We're in the midwest and we have the same time zone as the east coast.
Student: No we don't.
Me: Um, yes. Yes, we do.
Student: No we do not.
Me: Yes. Indiana and New Jersey are in the same time zone.
Student: No they're not.
Me: Yes... they really are.
Student: (Googles answer on phone) Oh okay. You're right.

We're in the last half hour of a service learning project splitting and hauling logs
A dozen male students sit on a porch drinking soda
I continue to haul logs back and forth to the wood pile
Student: Good job, Miss M. You really are the hardest worker.

Roger: Who did your team elect as "The Tallest"?
Students: Miss Mueller.
Roger: Great. The contest is... who has the tallest... thumb.
All contestants make a "thumbs up"
Students: EUGH! Miss Mueller has alien fingers.
Me: Excuse me?
Student: It's okay, though. They're proportional to your body!